13w6d, tutus and one LONG vent

I am officially out of my first trimester, and am mostly done with the icky feelings. Still very exhausted, because sleep alludes me even though I am freakin' tired. And still not gaining any weight, but seeing as I was a good 20 lbs overweight, I'm not concerned.

AND, I met my midwife. She is so sweet, so laidback, so my kinda midwife! She owns a birth center, but also attends homebirths. We are leaning towards another homebirth, but I am glad we have another comfortable, safe option if we aren't feeling 'home' (because I KNOW we will not be feeling hospital unless there is a medical reason for it). I was pleasantly surprised, though, that Andy thinks he'd prefer home... since our previous midwife missed Sasha's homebirth, I was thinking of the birthcenter for his sake, mostly.

And, Ali's wedding is in less than a month. Woohoo! Our trip out there begins in just over a week, with a stop in Colorado Springs to spend several days with my Jaimie, and at some point some time with my April (April! We've got to look at schedules... Friday, June 10th, in the evening??? or some time Saturday June 11th, during the day???) Combined, Ali and Daniel have 3 nephews and 5 nieces. Or, 3 nephews and 5 flower fairies. The 3 youngest - Lauren, Kate and Sasha - will be in tutus. (And shirts, my model was naked for the photo shoot - we're lucky she had the tutu on at all, as she was also throwing a tantrum.) I am really happy with how they turned out. Really, really happy. Sometimes I get my craft on and really kick some butt. ;-)



And, on the drama side of things, I am done with drama. Been done for years, but occasionally some sneaks in, and I get to figure out how to deal. So, here's my vent about the situation... feel free to ignore if you want, I just need to get it out.

A year ago Judy and I became friends. Very good friends very quickly. And I observed that her favorite way to deal with conflict was to get pissed at people and not talk about it, but choose to ignore/avoid the person she's mad at. I really didn't think anything of it when she had problems with her neighbor, because she always talked about how her neighbor frustrated her, and *hello* you can't pick your neighbors, so if you need to ignore them, so be it. I really didn't think much about it when a similar situation happened with the wife of her husband's coworker. Again, *hello* sometimes people are in your life whether you want them there or not.

BUT, seeing as we chose to be friends, how she confided an awful lot in me, and I in her, that we have loads in common, when I wanted to talk about an issue between our daughters, this is how the conversation went:

me: Aubrey said that Jax kept touching her during dance class and wouldn't stop, so she asked me to talk to you about it.

J: Well that's not what Jax said happened, but I don't want to talk about it. This isn't the first time this has happened, and I just told Jax to stay away from Aubrey.

me: That's probably a good idea, a break would be good for them.

And that's where the conversation ended because some people can't have an uncomfortable conversation in order to make things better. And the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. I'm left to assume that Judy thinks Aubrey is some evil bully (because I have no idea what Jax's side of the story is) as opposed to two grown ups helping their growing daughters realize that they can talk to eachother and figure out a way to get along, because any rational person knows that what actually happened lies somewhere in the middle of Aubrey's side and Jax side.

(No, this was not the first incident between the girls, but I ignored previous incidents as I've always encouraged Aubrey to use her words and work things out on her own if she can.)

SO, I haven't had a conversation of substance with Judy in over a month, and I am counting down the days until we leave on our trip, as by the time we get back, they will have moved to Connecticut. I know, very mature of me. But I've spent enough energy on this crazy lady when she wasn't implying that she didn't like my kid... I have no more energy to spend on her now. And, honestly, I am the one doing the avoiding, but it all relates to her not knowing how to communicate if there's something other-than-pleasant to talk about.

Thanks, feels good to get that out. :-) BTW, something kinda funny... Andy has always maintained that Judy's crazy. I should know by now to trust his take on people. And not necessarily avoid them, but keep a bit more distance than I kept from Judy.